I promise to put up the vegas stories soon i am slacking pretty hard on the blogging butttttt i now have blogging on the go with my droid so that should be quicker

City Kitty in Sin City

Off to Vegas with 5 amazing girls!!!
Staying right next to he Paris at Ballys
weeeeeee!

twenty two ignis

below is something I wrote two years ago, ripe with stress and bitter with failure..

twenty ignis, twenty nova annus, twenty annus mirabilis. twenty and I am scared as hell. so young to be looking back and wishing I could do it over. I don't have a wrinkle of time to show for it, save for the broken vessel high on my inner thigh. frightened by the fact that I tried to squeeze my eyes tight , wishing to open them up to reality, wishing it was all just a dream. you never know if you never try. pushing like I was setting my sailboat adrift, sliding the books under my bed. they are too painful to look at. they are drenched with my failure. I tried to make it last forever.
it felt like forever, but it was only a piece. and somehow without it I feel like it was my peace. my escape. the last drill, you tried, you just didn't succeed.
look past everything you ever learned.

my words just break. subject: Verbum. you were mine, my own prototype.

I should try to make it right. I was ready for the shit to hit.

I'm too busy to make amends.

there's never enough time, I've never wanted so much, to be able to rewind.

I could leave you if I wanted, but now I find there is no where else that I can be.

ITS ALL SUCCESS IF ITS WHAT YOU NEED.

you're a marigold baby.

two years later.. 2 hours into being 22 years old.. the stretch to finish something seemed so far away when I wrote that, bummed that I had to let something go that I couldn't accomplish. It is true, "this too shall pass", and it became today, the present, and the future is an open field of long long grass ready for me to run through. I'm ready, with my cowgirl boots and my sideways grin.